This is the horrible dream of the Chinese Restaurant. You have been sentenced to address the Society for Plane Geology on the subject of replicious schists. You are the leading world expert on replicious schists.
However, your audience cares not a tick about anything you have to say. They are having a noisy, elaborate banquet. If you try to get their attention they will stop simply ignoring you and begin actively shouting you down.
Also, the lecture banquet is being held in three different rooms arranged in a Z pattern, so that you have to keep jogging back and forth from one room to another, shouting your wisdom over and over at the dining throng.

Who's got the crispy beef with bean curd?